2018-06-15 09:00:00 CET

Will your child grow up to be a pro beach player?

Here are five ways to find out, because they aren’t ordinary children…

Part of being a parent requires you to make it up as you go along. In between winging it and making quick flippant decisions that affect their whole lives, you also kinda wish that you could identify your child’s strengths from as early as possible. That would be amazing because you could then focus on their talents and nurture them so that they are given the best possible guidance and support. How do you know that beach volleyball is going to go beyond just being a hobby, extra-curricular activity or school sport? Is there a way that you could tell that your kid is a little beach pro in the making?

50 years ago that answer would’ve been a resounding NO. But you know, times have changed, technology has advanced exponentially. We didn’t have a definitive list of attributes in the recognizing of children’s beach volleyball potential, but now we do. And since we are quite into the business of beach volleyball, we’ve taken it upon ourselves to author this definitive list. Without further ado, you know your child is going to grow up to be a pro beach volleyball player when… 

1. Swimwear is the only wear

One of the first ways to tell that this is a little pro in the making is when your little angel is only comfortable in on-trend, on-fleek swim-leisure. No suit? No problem. When your child wears his or her swimwear to school, at home, to a restaurant for your big family dinner and better yet… to his or her graduation, it’s time to have the beach volleyball talk. They are probably taking the ‘dress for the job you want’ saying literally. Best thing to do in this case: Pair the swimming trunks with a loose fitting, breathable vest, you could even go so far as having their  names printed on it along with their country codes. The possibilities are endless.

Look how happy beach volleyball attire can make you. Photocredit: Malte ChristiansLook how happy beach volleyball attire can make you. Photocredit: Malte Christians

2. Holidays are a little more complicated

Ever imagined that perfect city trip, a spot of sight-seeing, parade through museums, taking nice family photographs in city centers… imagine it no more. With a bourgeoning beach volleyball player on your hands, the last holiday destination will be to some inner-city because let’s face it, once you’ve seen one inner-city, you’ve seen all inner cities. No no no. Your little munchkin will protest to make sure that there will be a beach somewhere in the picture. All holidays should involve the beach. Best thing to do in this case: embrace all drinks in coconuts and work on your own swimwear wardrobe.

Now that’s what I’m talking about! Photocredit: Mihai StetcuNow that’s what I’m talking about! Photocredit: Mihai Stetcu

3. A simple exchange is simple no more

We are constantly handing things over and taking things from other people. When you’re a parent, you do this all the time with your little ones. ‘Dad fetch me this’ is usually followed by the dad proceeding to fetch said item and handing it over to his little cherub. As a parent you might also ask your little cutie-pie to fetch you something and hand it to you. BUT ‘Can you pass me the remote’ with a growing beach volleyball pro may result in injuries from said remote being ‘pokied’ across the living room, it may also be served. Best thing to do in this case: when your little loved one is practicing beach volleyball moves with everyday items, buy them a ball. (It might also be a good idea to think of a code word like ‘Timber’ so that everyone knows to duck down – no more remotes in the face! I thank you.

Nooooo, don’t, not with my coffee… Photocredit: Sebastian MarkoNooooo, don’t, not with my coffee… Photocredit: Sebastian Marko

4. Bedtime means dive time

Ordinary children have let’s say… uneventful bedtimes. Baths are had, Teethes are cleaned, and bedtime stories are read. Beds are gotten into. Sleeps are started. Like we said, rather uneventful. You little growing star has an anything but uneventful bedtime. Bedtime should actually be called dive-time because of all the awesome diving into bed that happens. Why just get into bed when you can dive into bed? Kill two birds with one stone in our world, practices something awesome and gets the job done. Best thing to do in this case: try it because omg, its soooo much fun! You’ll never get into bed normally again.

This move can also be applied to getting into laying position on the couch. Photocredit: Martin SteinthalerThis move can also be applied to getting into laying position on the couch. Photocredit: Martin Steinthaler

5. Why build forts when you can build podiums?

One of the best pastimes that children from all over the world love is the art of building extraordinary structures out of ordinary household items. This couch is not a couch, it is the foundation of a knight’s castle surrounded by a moat, complete with fire-breathing crocodiles (they use their imaginations, it doesn’t have to make sense). From forts, to tents to castles children really let their imaginations run buck wild. You may be worried that your little darling is building less fantasy structures and building more podiums, which they then stand atop and bow for the awarding of their pretend medals. Best thing to do in this case: see it as practice for all the awesome medals he or she will win one day.

All the pretend-play was worth it, look at me now. Photocredit: Sebastian MarkoAll the pretend-play was worth it, look at me now. Photocredit: Sebastian Marko

And that concludes our little list of beach volleyball pro signs. We hope you had a laugh and obviously took it very seriously, because it is all based on fact. To all the dads out there doing their bit for the growing stars of beach volleyball, Happy Father’s Day. 

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